“You’re weird.” Ouch. Who knew two little words could hurt so much? When it comes to sex (or anything vaguely sexual), a lot of us have been made to feel, well, ashamed of it, which is total bullshit.
When was the first time you were made to feel weird because of your sexuality? What was your first encounter with slut-shaming (or prude-shaming) like? Why do you think it happened?
I distinctly remember being made fun of as a teen for my enthusiasm regarding making out. Making out. Apparently in “normal people world” one should never, ever act like they’re enjoying anything vaguely sexual (especially us ladies). I had an ex-boyfriend who told my friend I acted “way too excited” when we’d get our mack on. When my friend told me about it she said, “You’re weird.” Ouch. What was I supposed to do? Lay there like a dead fish while he jammed his tongue down my throat? How fun for me. I felt so embarrassed whenever the subject was brought up; I was made to feel like a total freak for kissing. How fucked up is that? Come to think of it, when I finally started having sex, I was actually called a “freak” by a male friend because he heard I “liked having a lot of sex.” Well, excuse me, mister, for not adopting a more Victorian-esque sexuality.
The other side to this coin: Being made fun of for not going far. That’s right, I was both a weirdo for loving a good make out session and a total prude for not letting some dude feel me up in his van. I just couldn’t win in high school, I tell you.
What say you?
Another question I’d like to throw out for consideration: Persephone parents (or future parents), do you plan on teaching your kids about not judging others’ sexuality? Will you address the topic of slut shaming? How? (I ask because how awesome would it be if we could raise an entire generation to not give a fuck about other people’s consensual sex lives? Very awesome, and if I ever have kids I’d like to help do just that.)