Monday Night Flashback: Curfew

[E] Sally J. FreedmanOpen Thread57 Comments

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Happy Monday, Perspehoneers! I hope you had a fabulous spring weekend, whether you indulged in NCAA basketball, leprechaun fun, or just a regular weekend.Here in P-Mag’s hometown, the perfect weekend was marred by the drive-by shooting of five teens around 10 p.m. on Saturday night. As I’m writing this, three of the victims have been released from the hospital, while two remain in serious condition. It’s opened the discussion here about teens congregating in public places, teen curfew, and who’s responsible for said teens.

It got me thinking: in 10 years will I let my 16-year-old “hang out” downtown? It also, of course, got me thinking back to my time as a loitering teen. My hometown has one of the biggest public beaches on the shores of Lake Michigan. When the weather was nice, that’s where everyone was. We drove around the parking lot, just like teens today drive around Monument Circle. While I’m sure kids got in trouble, my group never did. We hung out, and then headed home around midnight.

What was your curfew as teen? Where did you “hang” with your friends?

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[E] Sally J. FreedmanMonday Night Flashback: Curfew

57 Comments on “Monday Night Flashback: Curfew”

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  1. Avatar of Bryn Donovan
    Bryn Donovan

    In high school I had to be home by midnight on weekdays, one a.m. on weekends. I worked till after 9 pm on weekdays, so it didn’t leave as much hanging-out time as it sounds like! I didn’t get into any trouble, but sometimes cops wanted the skater punk guys we hung out with to go skate somewhere else.

  2. Avatar of freckle [M]
    freckle [M]

    The West Wing is seven seasons, for Peter Pan Sake! Is there a short cut? C J Cregg’s best episodes? Because I’m willing to learn, but there needs to be time for other stuff?

        1. Avatar of [M] QoB
          [M] QoB

          It’s about Big Block of Cheese Day. It’s not totally CJ-centric but if I remember right she is hilarious in it.

          Note to self: must get all 7 seasons on DVD.

  3. Avatar of [E] Liza
    [E] Liza

    I didn’t have a set curfew. When I went out my parents would set a time, or if it was something like a concert they’d ask me to come straight home or call them if I was going to stop for food or something.

    But I was a nerd who never got in trouble.

        1. Avatar of
          CorinaDee

          I always read ‘exeunt’ as ‘excunt’.

          Which is how it should be. Just as it should be.

  4. Avatar of Opifex
    Opifex

    I never had a curfew as a kid, largely because I never needed one. If I wanted to go somewhere and stay out late I just told my parents and there would be a quick Q&A about terms (who with, will there be chaperones, who’s driving) and everything was settled. I was a really tame teenager. Which is why I was really surprised to learn after I got out of high school that I had a reputation for throwing kick ass parties, and that there were people that were jealous that I had never invited them. These “parties” were really just a few friends coming by for all night anime marathons, which happened maybe once a month or so at my house, because my friends and I were super nerdy. I never realized that the rumor mill surrounding these get togethers had somehow turned them into epic party time.

  5. Avatar of Alex
    Alex

    I don’t have a curfew. My mum’s general rule is that if I do something stupid enough to get arrested, I’ll have done something worth being arrested, and she’s aware I’d know how stupid I was.

    As it is, the only thing I do is sneak onto the golf course at night during the summer and drink with friends.

    I also had my first proper counselling session yesterday (as opposed to a preliminary). I talked about my mother a lot. I felt significantly worse after I left, but I think that’s the point. Then I ate empty carbs.

     

    1. Avatar of shellsncheese
      shellsncheese

      In my experience therapy always makes me feel worse before it makes me feel better.  Don’t worry too much about.  Hopefully you will feel better soon.  I used to try to plan to do something afterwards.  Nothing big, just something like run to the store to pick up a new shirt or meet a friend for coffee.  That way I could harp on the session forever.

      1. Avatar of Alex
        Alex

        I went to subway and bought one of everything they have under £2. Nachos, pepperoni cheese and tomato bread thing, cheese bread thing, salad, and meatballs.

        It was magnificent and I felt a lot better (passed an hour-long bus wait, too >.>)

    1. Avatar of Liadan
      Liadan

      Same. I kind of never did anything wrong, since I didn’t drink or do drugs and my mom didn’t care about the sex with my long-term boyfriend as long as I was on the pill. I think one time I was grounded for being a brat, but it didn’t take. She probably would have been relieved if I’d gone out and gotten in trouble, because then I wouldn’t have been quit such a nerd!

  6. Avatar of freckle [M]
    freckle [M]

    There was me going out very little (for lack of friends) but when around my seventeenth I started taking trains somewhere, it was always ‘Get at least the second to last train and call us when it leaves with you in it!’

  7. Avatar of Savannah Logsdon-Breakstone
    Savannah Logsdon-Breakstone

    I didn’t have one. I hung out on the computer, and was allowed to do what ever I liked so long as I was willing to show my mom. I have no shame about reading lots of smut, though, so she only ever checked once then decided I seemed to know more about things than she did.

    That’s also why I never got the talk- by the time she got over her embarrassment about the topic, I already had an impressive and accurate education on the topic thanks to websites like planned parenthood’s and so forth. :)

  8. Avatar of wannabemusicologist
    wannabemusicologist

    I just wanted to let you P-mag folks know about this REAL women of Canada (an anti-choice, anti-divorce, anti-LGBT, anti-wage parity non profit) has been selected (by the Harper government) as one of the non-profits to assist in the awards nomination process for the Queen’s Diamond Jubilee awards. You can sign a petition here or write the Canadian Governor General here.

    I just thought I should let you all know that basically a hate group (I think it’s the canadian equivalent of one million moms) has a place in a process which is important for Canada since it seems to be totally flying under the radar in the media. ( Hey, Harper’s a sneaky turd, so this is not shocking).

  9. Avatar of marthamydear
    marthamydear

    I’m expecting to get a call any minute now to cue me to spring into action- my SIL is having her baby right now! First grandchild for my boy’s side of the fam, so this is a Major Family Event. As soon as I get the call I’m heading to the hospital! So exciting!

  10. Avatar of shellsncheese
    shellsncheese

    I didn’t have a curfew as a teen or at least I got to set it myself.  I had to tell my parents what time I would be home and be home by that time, later was not acceptable.  I mostly hung out in friends basements with an occasional trip to the local lake.  My sister hung out at the golf course and on the train tracks (until someone got hit by a train).  I probably wouldn’t want my kids hanging out in any of those places.

    I grew up in a fairly safe suburban town and really didn’t have many rules.  Although my mom has since admitted that since a lot of my friends had very strict parents she often told me I could do things (like go to NYC for a concert) and counted on me not having any friends that were allowed to go with with me.

     

  11. Avatar of sonjamikail
    sonjamikail

    My curfew was usually around 11, but I could usually get around that pretty easily. My mom would be in bed, so I would knock on her door to let her know that I was home and then just go back out. I finally told her about it when I was 25, and she was shocked, shocked, not only that I would do that, but also that she never caught me or figured it out.

    In other news, I got the job!!! I’m so excited. I start April 2nd, and I wish it would hurry up and get here.

  12. Avatar of Silverwane
    Silverwane

    Boo, it put it in the wrong place again!

    But, I was going to post here anyway.

    I didn’t have any real curfew when I was a kid, because I was never allowed to go out. :/ I think the latest I was ever allowed to stay out without my parents was one time, and it was around 11pm or so… but they were still around in the area.

    Even when I went off to college, when I was back on breaks they expected me home. One time Mr. Silverwane and I went on a double date with friends, and we were out till 2pm. My parents were pissed at me.

    I had been at college for two years. I was 18.

    …I was not pleased with their reaction, to say the least!

    1. Avatar of KellsBells
      KellsBells

      dude – same thing happened to me!  My sister and I went to the same college (big mistake) and she would report to my parents when she thought I wasn’t doin’ what I was ‘spossed ta.  It took me like three months to realize, “I’m in college.  I can go out whenever and with whomever I damned well please.  Fuck you, the horse you rode in on, and anyone else for that matter.”  She eventually mellowed out, but the constant observation, judgement, and tattling meant 1) I never took a Spring Break trip, 2) I had to hide relationships for months 3) I could never go out to the bars 4) I had to steal my own car on several occasions (long story, but she used to hide the keys).

      I really feel cheated out of my college experience.

  13. Avatar of veruna
    veruna

    My hometown had a curfew, so I had to follow that. 10:30 Sunday-Thursday and 12:30 Friday and Saturday. My parents only inflicted a stricter curfew when grades slipped. Otherwise, I was responsible for my own schedule.

  14. Avatar of Lis
    Lis

    Off-topic, but… I have a phone interview on Wednesday! For a job that I really, really, really, really want!

    It would bring me to NYC, which is super amazingly exciting.

  15. Avatar of fifthpevensie
    fifthpevensie

    I didn’t really have a curfew when I was a teenager, it was more of a “case by case” thing with my parents, you know, where was I going, did I have a ride, did I work the next day, that kind of thing. granted my friends and I usually hung out at my house which was a ways out of town.
    the school I did my undergrad at, however, definitely had a curfew. midnight on weekdays, 1am on weekends (whether or not Sunday night counted as a weekend night depended on your RA). you had to stick to that curfew until/unless you were 21 or living out of dorms (and you had to be 21 to live out of dorms).

    Sally, I hear you on the marred weekend thing. We had a heinous riot Saturday night, great way to get your city some attention! gag. so there’s lots of “What’s with this generation?” stuff happening. it was pretty awful.

    1. Avatar of marthamydear
      marthamydear

      The guy whose news car got trashed is a colleague of my dad’s! What a mess. A bunch of my friends are new grads and people have been looking at them sideways as they’re young and therefore suspicious.

      1. Avatar of fifthpevensie
        fifthpevensie

        hey no way! I just watched an interview with the news crew who was there.
        I actually threw up after I saw the riot footage. I almost died in a fire when I was seventeen, and I know I sound like Smokey but seriously fire is nothing to mess with, and it’s amazing that none of those houses caught fire too. … seriously I may be the only private citizen currently going “Has NO ONE taught these people about fire safety?”

        my brother is a Fanshawe student, and we were hanging out at mine on Saturday night. our parents emailed us on Sunday with the “We hope you weren’t at the riot!” emails, and London is just a mess. people are pissed at Fanshawe, or at anyone under 30, or at the police (I mean, I am actually kind of pumped there wasn’t any police violence… but that’s me…). everyone’s mad at someone. and now my bro has to deal with the whole “for the next while if I say I’m at Fanshawe getting hired will be a pain in the ass” thing.
        it’s all ridiculous. and senseless.

  16. Avatar of hiphiphooray
    hiphiphooray

    I actually didn’t really have a curfew because I lived in a rural town and usually just slept-over at a friend’s house on Friday night. I was no wild child!

    But! I got engaged this weekend! It only took two days to reach my parents in Sri Lanka.

    1. Avatar of fifthpevensie
      fifthpevensie

      congratulations!!! that’s so exciting!

      on the engagement but also on the no curfew thing.

      is there a “proposal story” to tell? or ring pictures if there was a ring?

      1. Avatar of hiphiphooray
        hiphiphooray

        He booked a b&b on the Northern CA coast back in January, so I thought this might happen, but after dinner on Friday we went back to the hotel to open this present he’d had sitting out to pique my interest. So I opened it and it was a model Audi R8 (because he always jokes he’s going to buy me a nice car, and the joke is so old I don’t know where it came from by now), and in the hood was the ring! He got down on the knee, I said yes, and we had a bottle of Dom and a beautiful weekend on the coast without work/school :)

        Unfortunately, I only have pictures of it on my phone for now, but it is gorgeous (even with the cheap temporary setting until I decide on what I really want).

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