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News Appetizers: Now With More Punching

Welcome to the party, ladies, and it’s maybe a little bit of a free-for-all, with no truly good news, but at least one person got their just desserts.

Animated gif of a cartoon unicorn getting punched

Sometimes this is what the news feels like.

First we have to talk about Gaza. It’s a cluster. Everyone is very, very upset. I think one of the best things I ever watched on the whole Israel/Palestine thing was on “An Idiot Abroad” when the dude crosses the border and is like, “Well, that was depressing.” NYTimes

BP is pleading guilty to 14 criminal charges and paying $4.5 billion over the gulf oil spill two years ago. You know, if corporations are people, can we give them the death penalty? Juuuuust curious. NYTimes

Turns out gays really care about voting for a candidate who doesn’t oppose their right to marry. NYTimes

Mittens blames his loss on “gifts” that Obama gave to African Americans, Hispanics, and young voters. These gifts include reliable access to healthcare and things like entertaining the idea of immigration reform. Because voting in your best interest is sooooo bad. It’s not like giant corporations don’t receives gifts, like tax breaks and mere slaps on the wrist with then do really illegal shit. We don’t see Mitt calling those “gifts.” BBC

Not really news, but fascinating: have we always eaten breakfast, lunch, and dinner? BBC

Live in a food desert? Access to reasonably-priced fruits and vegetables isn’t the solution. I wonder how long it will take someone to comment on this post and suggest that poor people just eat lentils? NPR (Don’t make that comment ~ed.)

5 hour energy has been cited in 13 deaths. I’ve never tried it. I’m kinda glad. Salon


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About the Author

Avatar of [E] Sally Lawton

[E] Sally LawtonI have an MA in political theory. By night I read and write about political theory or make attempts at the great American novel (or watch Doctor Who). By day, I hope for better things. I have my own blog, themostpretentiousblog.blogspot.com, which features me writing philosophical things.View all posts by [E] Sally Lawton →

  1. Savannah Logsdon-Breakstone
    Savannah Logsdon-Breakstone11-17-2012

    I have had the 5 hour energy. It tastes kind of meh– I’d rather chug Monsters or Kombucha (NOM NOM NOM).

    LENTILS FOREVER. AND NO SPICES, THOSE ARE FOR RICH PEOPLE. /Eye rolls.

  2. [M] freckle
    [M] freckle11-16-2012

    I had no clue what 5 Hour Energy is, making that head line very very confusing. But I guess that’s what we’re here for; to learn.

    • Silverwane
      Silverwane11-16-2012

      It’s an energy supplement that’s been marketed a lot in the US (I don’t know if it’s been sold much elsewhere). It’s got a lot of caffeine and other crap in it. They’ve been handing out free bottles at my university to try to get people hooked on it, but I’ve been staying away.

      • [E] Sally J. Freedman
        [E] Sally J. Freedman11-18-2012

        The “5 Hour Energy Girls” occasionally come through my office building making all kinds of noise and passing out little bottles to everyone on the floor. I have still have mine in my desk- I’ve never felt the need to try it. I think I will throw it out now.

        It’s much more fun with Jimmy John’s comes through with free sandwiches for everyone.

        It’s the little things.

  3. Ren
    Ren11-16-2012

    In addition, in news that do not suck: reports of a meningitis vaccine breakthrough: http://www.guardian.co.uk/society/2012/nov/16/meningitis-vaccine-breakthrough

    My friends’ first baby died of meningitis years ago, it’s none too soon to wipe this bastard out.

  4. Juniper
    Juniper11-16-2012

    I’m reminded once again that I know horribly little about Gaza and all else that goes with it. Have been on a hunt for a “simple” guide to it all and am still flummoxed.

    • Lis
      Lis11-16-2012

      I have also been looking to learn more of the history. A coworker who frequently asks me about news asked me about it, and the best I could explain was “They have been skirmishing for some time, and then one side was like ‘BTW we’re at war now, have some rockets to your civilian zones!’” Obviously I know skirmishing is am understatement, but… I have only fairly recently gotten into world news. So I don’t know the history as well as I think I should.

    • Opifex
      Opifex11-16-2012

      Basically Gaza is where Palestinian refugees ended up during the Arab-Israeli war in the late 40s and it was under Egyptian military rule for a long time then occupied by the Israeli military for a long time. It’s small, densely populated, and walled off from the rest of Israel. When Sharon pulled the Israeli military out, he refused to take steps to improve life for the citizens of the strip, like cleaning up the rubble. In 2006 Hamas came into power in Gaza. The US and the EU both consider the group to be terrorist (and not without cause, the group wants to wipe Israel off the map). They cut off aid to Gaza because of this and the economy was hit hard. Hamas likes to fire some really shitty (inaccurate, and unpredictable*) rockets into Israel and Israel responds by stomping the shit out of Gaza with no real regard to civilian casualties. It’s a massive cluster.

      *This most recent batch hit the sea off the coast of Tel Aviv and an empty space in Jerusalem for example. Sometimes they don’t even make it into Israel but land inside Gaza.

    • Savannah Logsdon-Breakstone
      Savannah Logsdon-Breakstone11-17-2012

      Only simple guide is the following: It is a giant clusterfuck on all sides.

    • [E] Sally J. Freedman
      [E] Sally J. Freedman11-18-2012

      Nothing about Gaza is simple. I’ve recently become friends with several people on Facebook (who live in the US) who have family in Israel, and they are terrified about what’s going on. They’ve been posting things from information sources here, and it’s just horrible. So scary.