Sometimes after a meal at a particularly disappointing restaurant, my brain goes into a frenzy/whirl of menuing better dishes. It’s like coming up with the perfect witty comeback hours (or days) later, but with tasty food ideas. Needs a wedge of lime, I smirk. Am I supposed to be impressed by this lurking sweet pickle?
I’ve planned out entire daydream-restaurants after eating something gross (like bitter enchiladas drenched in cold death mole) or something overpriced and overrated (like the trendy organic cherry dessert that tasted like cough syrup and chocolate). My comfort-slash-American-food restaurant would grind Guy Fieri’s into a tiny pile of bacon-y dust. My fusion sushi bar would combine improbable and delicate ingredients to make bite-sized masterpieces.
I also brainstorm along with the competitive chefs on Iron Chef, Chopped, and Master Chef– and I am forced to admit that I am a dang genius with secret ingredients (if you let the fact that I have basically no cooking skills slide).
If you had a restaurant, what dish would make you famous?
I’m torn between my home-style shrimp-n-grits with a crown of bacon and my epic zucchini maki with mint-cilantro chutney.