There is a reason “Reasons my son is crying” is such a successful and hilarious blog concept: It’s all true. Small children melt down over a lot of things. The few times I’m not annoyed with the little blighters for being unreasonable, I catch myself envying them the joy of letting it all out. There are at least twelve situations each week that make me want to shout and tear my hair out, so fair play to you, kids.
Here are the top ten moments my kids have lost it for the silliest reasons. I’m sure I’ll remember them for much longer than their first smiles or steps.
- Two matchbox cars stuck to a miniature plane with rubber bands do not align properly! He might be an engineer one day and solve this to his satisfaction. A million toddlers will thank him.
- I want to watch this television program from the BEGINNING! This is the only reason catch-up services were invented. Explaining to a two-year-old how television programming works will get you nowhere.
- This potato chip is broken! I demand an unbroken potato chip. If all the potato chips are broken, I will hold my breath until I get a fresh pack.
- I don’t want it to rain! Nobody does, dude. Nobody does.
- I don’t want to die! This is the time to be upbeat about average life expectancies while a little part of your heart gets crushed.
- The soup I loved yesterday does not taste the same today! I hate it and you lot are starving me. What have I ever done to you???
- It’s not Christmas/my birthday yet! I can’t wait! I will die in the process!!!
- I don’t want our house to be number 7, I like the number 8! We’re not moving, and that’s final.
- I can’t lick my butt like the cat does! When you think about it, it is frustrating to be outdone by a small animal that licks its own butt.
- I will never be able to breastfeed! The day we had to break that to our two-year-old son was a dark day in number 7.
What has caused dangerous meltdowns in your house? Let me know in the comments!