I’ve been watching Gilmore Girls: A Year in the Life. I’ve laughed, cried, felt my heart soar and ache, and wondered how it is that fiction can be so deeply touching. I keep coming back to something Emily Gilmore says; I wonder how this character, this fiction, has struck me so thoroughly in the heart. She says that, since Richard’s death, she can’t remember which side of the bed is hers. Read More Caregiving: It’s Beginning to Look a Lot like Christmas
Tag: caregiving
Caregiving: Fight Song
This has been the song on constant repeat. The soundtrack to my coming out of hibernation. The tune that I have reached for as I feel myself turning into a ball of stress. Winter has come and gone. Spring has bobbed ever closer; no longer a speck on the horizon, but a season that has come ashore with no particular idea what it wants to do besides being a little warmer. Read More Caregiving: Fight Song
Caregiving: A Ready-Made Christmas
The idea of a Christmas made up of beautiful homemade gifts, cards, decorations, and food is so enticing. Social networks are covered in ideas shared and tried. It is the season for giving, and the thought that counts seems to count more when the gifts are handmade. Banquets big and small ought to be labours of handcrafted love. Yeah, it isn’t happening that way here. Not this year. Read More Caregiving: A Ready-Made Christmas
Caregiving: Surrender
There comes a time to surrender. I can’t see how I will ever make my peace with it, but I endeavour to achieve acceptance. Read More Caregiving: Surrender
Caregiving: Monsters, Furniture, and Awareness
October seems to be the month of awareness. I feel very aware of mental illness. I watch it drag him down, bring him to his knees, smack him around for good measure. It’s interesting to see the manifestations of mental illness when personified or anthropomorphised. What kind of monster will it be? If I’m honest, I see mental illness less as a monster and more like a piece of furniture. Read More Caregiving: Monsters, Furniture, and Awareness
Caregiving: The Big Reveal
Except it’s been there all along: his diagnosis. Read More Caregiving: The Big Reveal
Caregiving: Delicate
It is easy to get lost in jargon when talking about mental health. I endeavour to keep conversation comfortable; I talk about my husband’s mental health issues. Issues. It is such a delightfully benign word to use. Issues. It suggests an easy to read pamphlet. Bullet points, perhaps? Issues. In my attempt to be delicate, I fear I am being misleading. Read More Caregiving: Delicate
Caregiving: Fear
Wearing his shirt isn’t meant to be dramatic. It’s soft and comfortable. It was in reach as I tumbled out of bed, bleary-eyed. All would be well by the afternoon. A hospital admission just to be on the safe side, that was all. Not his doing. Doctors who care. Gratitude for that helps to balance out the panic. Read More Caregiving: Fear