The Friend Breakup: What it Is, How to Recognize it, How to Handle It

“I’ve been friends with her for 10 years. I just saw on Facebook that she’s been in town hanging out with our other friends, but not with me. When I ask her if she’s mad at me, she dismisses me, but then I don’t hear from her for months.”

“She still wants to hang out with our old group of friends, but I hate some of those people now. I am just done with all of those people, and she doesn’t get it. We just don’t have much in common.”

“She’s been a selfish friend, and I’m tired of it. I’m over with the friendship.”

“I don’t even recognize her personality anymore.” Read More The Friend Breakup: What it Is, How to Recognize it, How to Handle It

Fitting In With The Cool Crowd

The first time I was asked to hang out with the most popular girl in our sixth grade class, I remember feeling a sense of rush and excitement. A short brown girl with thick hair hovering above my shoulders, breasts that developed too quickly for an 11-year-old, shadows of acne spread across my cheeks and braces with rainbow-colored bands — I was a walking disaster. I was also literally a clumsy mess despite the years of dance training I had up until that point. So when, let’s call her Hailey, asked me to come hang out at her table during lunch, I was stricken with delight. Read More Fitting In With The Cool Crowd

Distance Friendships — Sometimes, Add Effort?

Ever since my father put me to the Internet, I have been figuring out how to make, and maintain, long-distance friendships. I can tell you now that the first distance friendship I had some semblance of control over started in third grade. I can also tell you that in ten years, I still am no closer to figuring out the secret than I was then. I was probably closer then, considering how obsessed I was with actually having friends back then. Now, having embraced the individualistic concept, I am less geared towards maintaining friendships. I probably should work on that. Read More Distance Friendships — Sometimes, Add Effort?

The Psychology of Letting Go

TW: death, suicide

Last July, my friend J was found in a park, dead by his own hand. And I lost it. I’m still not completely sure why: though he’d been a huge influence on me, he’d also been out of my life for several years.  Read More The Psychology of Letting Go

On Food and Bonding

As a person who sometimes suffers from severe social anxiety, I often have a hard time finding common ground with people. I’m the awkward person off in the corner, biting the inside of my mouth and trying to find an in into the conversation. Read More On Food and Bonding

Movie Review: One Day

The past few weeks have been an endurance marathon of perseverance on many fronts. The news has often strained my ability to retain my belief in the inherent good in man and not give in the abject despair that greets you at every turn when you look at the headlines. So, to escape reality for just a bit, I decided for a few hours of romantic escapism and I finally rented One Day. I had seen the previews for One Day and, I’m a bit of a sucker for a good chick lit flick so I decided to invite Emma and Dexter to keep me company.  Read More Movie Review: One Day

Caregiving: Friendships

So. This week has decided not to behave itself and I didn’t realise quite how time was getting on. But I’m here now, with a cup of tea (green tea and cranberry, as it happens), suitably yummy things within reach and Laurena Segura playing in the background. Read More Caregiving: Friendships

Canceling Your Membership to the “Drama Club”

I just celebrated a birthday last week, and one of my resolutions to my newly 30-something self was that I was going to take any means necessary to end the drama in my life. As a person with high levels of anxiety, high blood pressure and occasional black moods, I felt it would be beneficial to my overall health and well-being to give my entire mental and emotional life a good, thorough spring clean. Perhaps it just comes with turning the big 3-0, or maybe it’s just where I am in life, but I’m finding it less and less fulfilling to give attention to dramatics, take part in shitstorms, and function day to day as a high-maintenance individual. Read More Canceling Your Membership to the “Drama Club”