This Witty Gentleman defies simple explanation. Let’s just say that he always makes an impression. (And he writes comic books!)
1. You’re running for Mayor, what’s your campaign slogan?
Vote ME for Mayor. I double dog dare you.
2. You’re given a restaurant to run, but only have the resources to serve one entree, one side dish, one dessert and one beverage. What are they?
(Okay, do I go for a hip answer or one that will make me money?) Pot roast, macaroni and cheese, strawberry trifle, and coffee. Good comfort foods and favorites of the old people who have money.
3. Cosmo claims it’s sexy for a woman to playfully slip her scrunchie ponytail holder around her lover’s member during foreplay. Is there any truth to this claim?
The concepts “scrunchie” and penis should never be considered at the same time. But if a woman with her hair down is paying attention to me in any way I’m pretty much happy about it.
4. What songs are on the mixtape you play when you want to get lucky?
“Don’t Let Me Be Lonely Tonight” by Isaac Hayes, “Lover Man” by Billie Holiday, “I Want a Little Sugar in My Bowl” by Nina Simone. An alchemically powerful combination of suggestion.
5. What is the last book you read?
“Blood’s a Rover” by James Ellroy
6. You’re granted super hero status unexpectedly. What’s your name and what’s your superpower?
Hammerhead. I would have the ability to headbutt things. Really well.
7. Mad Lib answer: Give me two nouns, two adjectives, a verb and an interjection.
Duck, pogo-stick, furry, slick, crank. Balderdash!
I am a furry duck in the tradition of slick pogo-sticks. In other words, I crank, Balderdash!
