7 Questions for a Witty Editor

Departing from our usual plan of asking a witty fella to step in and answer our entertaining questions, today we’re starting a new tradition of having an editor or writer step in to answer when we can’t find a willing fella.   I’m also introducing a couple of question changes, as the MadLib style questions are proving hard to maintain. Can you guess which editor (your choices are me, Sara B, Hattie, Sally J., PileOfMonkeys and Luci) gave this round a shot?

1.  You’re tasked with creating a new ice cream flavor, what is it and why?

Feed My Addictions: dark coffee ice cream with salted almond pieces, milk chocolate chips, and chunks of peanut butter cups.

2.  You’re chosen to remake any movie originally made between 1975-1990.  What movie do you remake and how do you cast it?

Labyrinth. Chloe Moretz as Sarah, Bowie stays as Jareth (duh), and Jon Stewart as the voice of Hoggle.

3.  What terrible song gets stuck in your head?

Right now,”Hey, Soul Sister,” which is probably the worst song in the history of music, and Train should be tried and found guilty of crimes against hearing and good taste. It’s on the Muzak loop at work, though, so I have to suffer through it at least twice a day.

4. Tell us about a woman who has been influential in your life.

This is such a tough one, since so many women have shaped me into the person I am. I’m going to take the unexpected route, and say that the worst boss I ever had was a huge influence. She made me realize that my life was headed in a direction that I didn’t want, so I made changes, turned things around, left that job, and started taking steps to make myself happier and stronger. I also learned how not to manage people from her, which has made me much more effective at my current job.

5. What’s your favorite joke?

A frog walks into a bank, carrying a small ceramic figurine. He asks for the loan manager, and a kindly old man sits down with him and starts asking him questions in an Irish accent. The frog has no job, but mentions that his dad is Mick Jagger, and that he can offer up his ceramic figurine as collateral. The loan manager is reluctant to give him the money, asking what the ceramic figurine is, until the man at the next desk leans over and says: “It’s a knick-knack, Paddy Mac, give the frog a loan. His old man’s a Rolling Stone.”

Bah-dum-CHING! (Thanks, dad!)

6. A band is now following you around performing your personal soundtrack wherever you go, who are they, and what are they playing?

The Boston Pops, and they’re playing a variety of theme songs to TV shows from my childhood. Often on the rotation, the themes from The A-Team, Magnum P.I., Growing Pains, Adventures of the Gummi Bears, Gimme a Break, and Silver Spoons.

7. What’s on your desk right now?

I’m currently desk-less, but my kitchen counter (where I’m working) has a cup of coffee, a box of Band-Aids, some bills, my purse, and a couple of Allen wrenches.