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LadyGhosts of TV Past

Being Human UK Retro Recap Episode 2.04

George makes a list to improve his life, Mitchell starts a Bloodaholics Anonymous group and Annie gets lessons on how to avoid the doors.

Flashback time: Tonight, we see Lucy, looking at some DNA results, admonishing the cheating parents. The creepy old man comes up behind her and introduces himself as Kemp. Thank you! Finally, I can give you a name! She thinks he’s reinforcements, a new employee, but he says that he’s there about the papers she wrote last year. About her theory that a gene could be the cause of all evil. He calls it a revelation. She says it was just speculative. He asks her about a sample they got last week that made no sense, that she probably blamed on a malfunctioning machine. Kemp says it was evil. He wants her to think about it, give him a ring if she’s interested.

In the present, Annie is following the postman around critiquing people’s mail. Well, what else are you gonna do when you’re dead? She sees a cop pull up to an alley and follows him because that’s a lot more interesting than mail. The cop on the scene says the victim hasn’t been dead long, probably an OD. Annie suddenly sees the dead man standing over his body. She asks if he knows what happened to him and he says, “They told me to wait for you.” A door appears and he tries to pull her through.

At the house, George is making sausage and is far too chipper. He’s tells Mitchell that he had a breakthrough after reading Nina’s letter. He’s made a list. Order is achieved. “You sure you okay?” Mitchell asks.

Annie wakes up in the alley and another young ghost has helped her. He introduces himself as Sykes, takes some thanks for saving her afterlife and heads on his way. Annie wants him to help her stop it happening, but Sykes wants to move on, be a free spirit, so to speak.

George asks Mitchell to help him face up to what happens to him during his time of a month. He’s an animal, he points out, he should be put in a cage. So he puts, “Buy a cage” on his list. Mitchell questions his plan, but George continues: It’s one night a month, it shouldn’t stop him from living the rest of the time. That’s on his list, too, kind of… in the form of getting a better job.

Annie is still following Sykes, threatening to haunt him. He tells her she’s a kid and fighting off the gatekeepers is adult stuff. He can tell by her aura that she’s not ready, but this just makes her want to learn how to read auras, too.

Mitchell is hanging out at the funeral home (does he have admin work to do? Is he a paper pusher?). One of the vampires brings in a girl who looks like a low-rent goth. The vampire explains that the boss gets first drink. They found her on an emo message board, she wants to be drunk from. “It’s a kind of groupie thing. Isn’t that better?” Mitchell tells the hapless lackey that no, it’s not and the girl requests bus fare home since she’s not getting bitten. Ivan comes is after overhearing and says that was an interestingly creative interpretation of the rules. Ivan tells Mitchell a story about a guy in AA he knew once and Mitchell looks at him. You can almost see the light bulb above his head. Almost.

George goes to see a man about a cage. For a very big dog, he explains. “About the size of a man?” the guy guesses. The man thinks he’s in the S&M community and he’s totally cool with that. He dabbles. He’ll even through in some handcuffs free of charge. At home, George rants about the impropriety of Bristol. Sykes is at home, too, but he’s still being slightly resistant to Annie’s requests for tutelage. Mitchell doesn’t know about Sykes. He thinks his timing is suspicious. Mitchell and Annie discuss George briefly, and agree that he needs to talk about Nina. Sykes reveals that he doesn’t want to teach Annie because there’s only one passing grade, he doesn’t want it on his conscience if he fails. Finally he agrees, “If it’s okay with your two dads.” After he leaves, George asks Annie if they can switch rooms because of the cage. She just looks at him, in disbelief. “Bad time?”

Mitchell has decided to make a Bloodaholics Anonymous group. Ivan thinks it’s ridiculous and  relates the idea to dancing bears in Russia: “This great big mountain of power and fury, done up in a fez and waist coat,” waiting to rip someone’s throat out. Mitchell wants Ivan to join up; he’s an old one, it’ll make the program legit. Mitchell worries about when the withdrawal hits and the memories come flooding back to all the dry vampires.

George is at a school, interviewing for a position. The principal’s assistant, a woman named Sam, gets him some water. George spots a photo on her desk and she confirms that it’s her daughter, Molly, 7. In the interview, the principal wonders what’s wrong with him, he’s massively overqualified for the position. George points out that it’s still a step up from a porter. The principal wants to know why he would settle for a remedial teaching job. George explains that two years ago he had an accident, but that he feels better now and ready to reenter the world.

Sykes starts on aura reading lessons with Annie. She doesn’t catch on to it immediately, and equates it to a magic eye thing. Suddenly, she sees grey around the man’s head. “It’s a tumor,” Sykes explains. Annie wants to let the man know, but Sykes thinks he already does. Annie jokes about reading Sykes’ aura, but he gets tetchy. His only rule is that she needs to stay out of there.

Mitchell finds Lucy at the hospital. He suggests 20 questions to solve the closed book issue. She’s not receptive at first, but eventually asks where he was the previous day. Without hesitation, he answers that he was at an AA meeting. Lucy is almost surprised. “So that’s your big bad secret, is it?” She points out his drinking at the pub the other night, but he says that’s not his drug of choice. She asks about the 12 steps, thinking that she should be on the amends list. She tells him that she’ll think about how he can make it up to her. George walks past and smirks as Lucy walks away. George kids Mitchell that she’s out of his league and guesses that there must me some other reason she’s chatting him up, access to drugs maybe. Mitchell points out that she’s a doctor and has her own access. George accidently bumps a patient into a wall but says it’s okay; he has enough tranqulizers to keep a horse out. He gets a brilliant idea and Mitchell steals some tranqs for him. George sets up a video camera on the cage and gets ready for the full moon.

At the Creepy Lab, Nina is in the chamber. She complains that she’s starting to get headaches. Lucy arrives and asks if they’re sure about this, if they’ve changed anything since the last time. Nina says that she has a nosebleed. Lucy tells her to relax. It’s part of the process. Kemp says that this is how we help them. We can recalculate for the next one, which they want to be George. Lucy points out that the best way to reach him is through Nina as Nina screams in pain in the chamber. Lucy yells to the tech and Kemp that if they don’t stop, she’ll explode and to lower the pressure. The tech looks at Kemp. Once the pressure is lowered, Nina still changes, even though she’s unconscious. Lucy thinks that’s a breakthrough. Before she leaves, she tells them to tell her it was a malfuntion. Nina needs to believe to get George in, she explains.

The next morning, George comes down and asks the roomies if the want to see the most beautiful sight: eight hours of a sleeping werewolf. Annie is so happy for George. He’s done it, he’s put the wolf to sleep. He hugs Mitchell, who demands he takes a shower as he is RIPE.

George starts his teaching job. He’s teaching English as a Foreign Language and today’s subject is the two meaning of “used to.” He’s interrupted by a student asking what the F word is. He thinks they’re making fun, but they’re not. They need to know these things. “People laugh at us, we don’t know F word,” one student explains. George consents and says that for 10 minutes every lesson, he’ll teach them about swearing. While George teaches the class about shutting the fuck up, the principal happens by. He asks to see George and tells him off for the language. George apologizes, but the principal insists that he repeats that he understands that. He’s just trying to humiliate George and talks down to him a lot. As he leaves, George makes the V sign at him. Translating UK dirty gestures, that’s basically the finger.

Sykes is giving Annie ghost lessons again. He teaches her about the frequencies in the TV. They recruit people through it. Annie turns it off and Sykes says well done. Annie jokes about introducing Sykes to more modern TV, but the frequency starts changing and it’s time for the lesson to be over.

At the BA meeting, Ivan steps in to attend. As he speaks, other vampires watch from outside the circle.

George and Sam meet for lunch and he is hungry. She asks how he’s finding it. He loves the students. She thinks he’ll be gone in six months of boredom. He thinks boredom is exciting after his dangerous life. He jokes that he was a superhero with the power of extreme hairiness. He picks up a glass and his hand shakes, so he excuses himself to the bathroom. There’s a large biker-looking guy at the urinal next to him and as they’re doing their business, George shouts out “cocks” involuntarily. The biker gives him a look as he walks out.

Sykes brings Annie home where George has made a bunch of dishes for their next lesson. Sykes says they’re testing her ability to taste. She places her hands on his head. George says it’s tingly. Annie closes her eyes, imagines it’s her eating. George takes some of the first dish. It’s cold… bright… lemon? It is lemon sorbet! Next up: meat. Lots of it, she says, but then sees a flash of the werewolf. Annie jumps back, explaining that she’s not feeling very well and wants to stop. George rages and screams, “I’ll just throw all this in the bin, shall I?” Annie and Sykes don’t how how to react to the outburst.

After the BA meeting, Ivan encourages them all to keep strong. He tells Mitchell that they need more tea and biscuits the group has grown so much. “All that matters is what happens on the stage, right?” He non-sequiturs to Mitchell. Mitchell asks what’s up and Ivan confesses that he can’t do it… he thought he could, but he can’t after 195 years. He won’t quit the group, but he wants to eat on the side. He can’t do it dry. “Do you have any idea what you’re asking me to do?” Mitchell asks.  “I could say the same to you,” Ivan retorts.

Late at night, Sam is getting George’s details. Turns out there was a crash and his whole file got erased. George lists his emergency contact as Mitchell, explaining that they’re just housemates. She goes for a folder and he goes for a kiss, then apologizes. She tells him that there wasn’t really a crash; she kind of deleted his file. On purpose. He says that was very devious as he goes in for a kiss again. Back at home that night, George watches the video of the wolf sleeping again, touches the screen, smiles sadly. Next day, he meets up with Sam again and goes for a kiss but she shies away. He shouts out, “Bollocks,” then, “Shit,” and then runs away around a corner. At home, he confesses his sudden Tourette’s to the roomies and then bursts out at them when they laugh at him. He realizes that he was foolish to think he could put the wolf to sleep. Mitchell doesn’t want to jump to that, but George knows what he’s feeling. The wolf wants to rage. He had a murderous vision about a kid with an annoying phone, but Annie points out that he didn’t do it, that’s the important thing. George thinks it’s just because the kid got off the bus.

Mitchell meets up with Ivan, but he’s not happy about it. Ivan did think he could go clean, he explains, but he was wrong. Mitchell brings him to a room with the girl from before. Disgusted, Mitchell tells him to enjoy his meal and walks away.

Sykes thinks that Annie is ready for the final exam. Turns on all the electrical appliances around the house (since it’s where she died). They wait and eventually all the devices begin to tune. They show her a vision of her dead body and open a door. The dead Annie taunts her and then turns on Sykes. “Have you told her what you did? Of all the men that died because of your mistake, your cowardice.” He starts freaking out and Annie tells him to focus, but he’s inside his head. Annie tells Dead Annie that she’s just tricks, she can’t do anything. “I thought you were an army of devils, but you’re not. You’re a magician who’s come to the end of his act,” Annie tells the Dead Annie. She pushes the door closed and the Dead Annie disappears. Sykes comes out of his stupor and thinks she did a good job.

At the lab, Lucy is telling Kemp about Mitchell leading a nest of vampires being clean. Kemp tells her that the funeral parlor reopened, which she didn’t know about. She thinks it’s just a building. Kemp worries that she’s lost sight and she thinks that he’s patronizing. With werewolves, he explains, they’re trying to free an innocent soul. Vampires can’t change. Lucy thinks Mitchell can and will prove it.

George goes to see Sam at work, but the principal is badly hitting on her, so he dashes before he gets too angry. He’s trying to calm down in his classroom and she comes in. She’s heard about the swearing. Doesn’t matter to her. She really does think it’s Tourette’s. He bursts out with a, “Fuck you,” and she laughs:  “One step at a time, tiger.” In the bathroom, he sees, “Mr. Sands Suck Cocks” written on the mirror. He goes to correct it (hey, proper grammar is important) as the principal comes in. George tries to just go, but the principal corners him, wanting an apology. He wants an apology for George daring to date a woman so out of his league. George can’t bring himself to do that and starts beating on the principal. “If you tell anybody about this, I will finish off the fucking job,” he threatens.

On a country lane, Annie sits with Sykes. She doesn’t get why people can’t see her again, but Sykes says she was never meant to be seen. She was something different. “A crease in the cloth.” Annie asks what happened to him. He was in battle, made the wrong choice… his men died. He didn’t want to have more blood on his hands, that’s why he didn’t help her. That’s why he doesn’t want to go through the door. He doesn’t know if they’ll welcome him. Sykes says that from now on the door will be her choice. She can’t imagine choosing it, but Sykes says that the world will change around her: “Eventually it becomes unbearable.”  He leaves, on to the next adventure.

At the BA meeting, Ivan is all handshakes and hugs and Mitchell is broody.

At the house, George cowers in his cage in the fetal position, crying. He’s now become the monster, not the wolf.

At this midpoint in the season, it’s so hard to discuss what has happened without foreshadowing what will happen. Annie is strong and empowered after her lessons with Sykes. Mitchell has a system in place and it works, unhappy though he may be with it. George thought he found a way to cage the monster, but only introduced the monster into the rest of his life. At whatever midpoint our characters are at, however, it’s only going to get worse for them. But that’s for another week.

By Crystal Coleman

Florida girl living on the west coast. During the day, I consult in social media and community management. I have a really cute puppy (Elphaba) and a British husband (I keep him for his accent) as well as an unhealthy relationship with parentheses. http://thatgirlcrystal.com

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