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None of Your Business (My Weight)

I’ve recently started training with a personal trainer, and in a few short sessions I’ve started to see really impressive results. I’m really happy with the work I’ve been doing and the muscles I’m gaining. I am really unhappy with the comments I’ve been getting from people I hardly know (my super, my neighbor who I rarely see, acquaintances I haven’t seen in 2 years, etc.) asking if I’ve lost weight. I know that most of our readers are tired of weight gain or loss being a topic of conversation that people feel is appropriate (pro tip: it’s not). So instead of writing a long post about how annoyed I am, I have decided to write an anthem that I think I will record and pass out to everyone who wants to talk about weight.

Sung to Salt ‘n Pepa – None Of Your Business

What’s the matter witcha image                                                                                                                    Why you gotta mess with mine?                                                                                                                            Don’t keep sweatin’ what I do                                                                                                                           My body’s gonna be just fine. Check it out.

If I wanna order fries, eatin’ ’em tonight                                                                                                        It’s none of your business                                                                                                                                    And if she gets a physique and exercise all weekend                                                                                     It’s none of your business                                                                                                                                Now you shouldn’t even get into what my double chins do                                                                        It’s none of your business                                                                                                                                   So don’t try talkin’ about mine, I’ll tell you one more time                                                                         It’s none of your business

Now who do you think you are                                                                                                                      Puttin’ your cheap two cents in.                                                                                                                  Don’t you got nothing better to do                                                                                                                Than worry ’bout my back end? Check it.                                                                                                           I can’t lose nothing, girl, without somebody buggin’                                                                                      I used to think that it was me, but now I see it wasn’t

They told me to change, then when I did they wouldn’t drop it                                                              Opinions are like assholes and everybody’s got one                                                                                         I never comment on your body, unless I was asked to                                                                           Believe me, if talkin’ ’bout me’s what I want, I’d let you know, sir                                                            I’m not one for an opinion poll                                                                                                                       Not like the girls on 90210 fo sho

If I wanna order fries, eatin’ ’em tonight                                                                                                        It’s none of your business                                                                                                                                    And if she gets a physique and exercise all weekend                                                                                     It’s none of your business                                                                                                                                Now you shouldn’t even get into what my double chins do                                                                        It’s none of your business                                                                                                                                   So don’t try talkin’ about mine, I’ll tell you one more time                                                                         It’s none of your business

 

 

 

By Luci Furious

There are no bad times, only good stories.

3 replies on “None of Your Business (My Weight)”

When I lost weight from barely being able to afford food, I was really annoyed when anyone complimented my weight loss. I was like, “uh, thanks. I’m really hungry and tired most of the time, not on purpose!” But then when I worked out and watched my eating on purpose and lost weight (having re-gained in between), I was still uncomfortable with people asking me what I did. I just didn’t really want that to be anyone else’s business (as you said).

I mean, it was somewhat on purpose–I was taking 10ish hours of dance per week, running, and swimming. My friend was getting in shape for her wedding, so I’d meet her at the gym for support. I chose to do a lot of these physical activities for a break from school work and to do a social thing with my friend, not purely so people would always talk about my body.

I dunno. It’s just uncomfortable to me to have my body be something people can comment on in that way.

1.) That song is brilliant. Absolutely brilliant.

2.) SERIOUSLY (so serious it necessitates caps), why do people assume that weight is a polite topic of conversation? I can think of one personal anecdote offhand that illustrates this point: I was on a prescription pain medication (prescribed to me by my university’s health center…red flags everywhere, I know) and it gave me a really serious stomach ulcer over the span of almost four months. I unsurprisingly lost a LOT of weight and was getting frequent compliments from acquaintances (never friends – but then again, they possessed the ever-valuable element of CONTEXT) along the lines of, “Oh, you’ve lost so much weight, you look great! What’s your secret?!” My secret? Oh, just let some prescription pain pills eat a bunch of holes in your stomach lining so that eating becomes too painful, and you just stop eating! It’s like magic! You should seriously try it.

Gah. Why would you approach someone with this question? What if they’ve lost a ton of weight due to chemo/radiation, or the loss of a loved one, or a tough breakup? What if they’re seriously ill, or depressed? I understand it’s meant to be taken as a compliment, but bringing up something that not only is none of your business but a potential invasion of very personal privacy is not cool. Maybe just say they look great, and leave it at that?

I’ve been getting a lot of compliments lately too about my weight. When people ask how I’ve done it, I say I’m on the ‘PhDiet’ – as I try to finish my dissertation I’ve been living on on black coffee, broken dreams, and stress that gives me such bad stomach pains & reflux that I can’t eat. That is, when I’m not sobbing into my gin and (diet!!!!Omg) tonic.

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