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The Frisky Feminist

Happy Horny Holidays!

Q: For the upcoming holidays, would you compile a list of your favorite toys from around the web?  My absolute favorite place for vibes is Jimmyjane, but I’ve never bought any toys for two (that is to say, that two participants can use together).  I’m sure I’m not the only one out there looking for a good gift idea. 

A: Certainly! (And for some great suggestions for gifts for yourself, have a look at this post from Coco!)

Picture of Sportsheets's Under the Bed Restraint System box
Image from JT’s Stockroom.

We’ve endorsed this before, in our two-part series on BDSM for beginners, but one of our favorite purchases is Sportsheets’s Under the Bed Restraint System. I ordered it on Amazon as a birthday present for myself/us, and it arrived on my birthday, which was just delightful. You can use it whether or not you have a headboard and foot board on your bed, since the straps all run underneath the bed, and you can also clip and un-clip the cuffs in various ways to suit whatever restrain-y fantasies you may have. The two big pluses for us, in addition to the versatility, were that the kit is made from nylon and Neoprene (it can sometimes be hard to find many non-leather options), and it can very easily be gathered up, wadded up, and hidden in a drawer if you’re having company over and would prefer they not know about your kinky interests. If you’re interested in really heavy-duty bondage and restraint, it may not be for you, but if you’re just starting out or want something more affordable than some of the fancier kits, it’s a great option.

We-Vibe II
Image from Good Vibes

Next is something that isn’t a personal favorite of ours, because we haven’t tried it, but that a few of our friends have raved about – the We-Vibe 3. (So good, apparently, that they made a few sequels!) It’s meant to be worn during intercourse (though you could definitely wear it during other kinds of sex too, as well as solo), with one end inside you stimulating your G-spot (and your partner too) and the other end outside stimulating your clitoris. It’s waterproof, rechargeable, and made from silicone, and it has six different speeds and two levels of intensity for you and your partner to play with. I was always skeptical about how well it would stay in during penetrative sex, but the people we’ve talked to have had only good things to say about it. So if you and your partner like some vibrate-y action in addition to any penetrative sex you’re having and you’re able and willing to spend about $130 (the We-Vibe 2 and some other similar vibes are a bit less), this could be a good gift to consider. Plus it comes in fun colors.

Purple sea urchin
This is a picture of a sea urchin, so don’t put this on your bits.

Another way to incorporate some vibration for two into your gift-giving, if you or your partner have a cock (either attached or of the strap-on variety), is a cock ring. We’ve got two old posts about cock rings, so if you’re not terribly familiar with them but think you’d like to be, give those a look! There’s everything from your simple, basic vibrating ring to rings that have three bullet vibes and look like bulls or elephants or sea urchins with all their little nubs and spikes and things. (The ones with a lot of texture are our personal favorite.)

(Also, don’t be afraid to try incorporating sex toys that you think of as being for one person into your partnered sex life – a plastic G-spot vibe may not be designed with two people in mind, but if you experiment you may find that it can work quite well in different places on different people!)

Sin In A Tin massage candle
Image from Amazon

A great gift that’s not specifically for sex, but that could certainly be incorporated before or after, is a massage candle. The ones we’ve got are from a BDSM store in our hometown and we use them more for wax/temperature play than for massage, but something like this, by Sin In A Tin, looks pretty similar. And we love anything that can serve multiple purposes or be used in different ways, so a candle or two to help set the mood that can later be used for a relaxing massage could be a nice gift for you and your partner to share.

Now that you have a few gift ideas, where are the best deals? If there are any sex shops in your town or city, check them out to see if they have any sales right now. If you like to do your shopping online, lots of different sites are having holiday deals. EdenFantasys is offering free gifts with a variety of different purchases as well as a certain percentage off for every certain amount of money you spend. Babeland offers some pre-wrapped gift kits as well as some gift suggestion guides and free shipping on orders over $99. Adam and Eve is offering free shipping for orders over $29 and a rotating set of holiday sales, and Good Vibrations has some great discounted gift kits for sale, in addition to a $5 off coupon for subscribing to their newsletter. Finally, JT’s Stockroom is having a SeXmas sale, with discounts on everything from vibrators and lube to canes and nipple clamps (one pair with festive little bells!) and has free shipping on orders over $69.

Persephoneers, anything to add? Have you received (or given) any sexy-sex gifts that you just loved?

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Keep the great ques­tions com­ing! (Hee.) Got a ques­tion to ask, sub­ject you’d like us to dis­cuss, or myth you’d like us to bust? You can e-mail us at FriskyFeminist@persephonemagazine.com or send us an anony­mous mes­sage via the spiffy new Ask Us! fea­ture here.

By paperispatient

I recently earned my MA in women’s studies. I enjoy reading, working out, playing Scrabble, watching cheesy movies, and cooking yummy vegetarian meals with my partner and Frisky Feminist co-author, Future Mr. paperispatient.

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