Q: To counteract the insanity of the holiday season, I decided to treat myself to a number of romance/erotic novels. One thing that I keep wondering about is all these women who, when starting to get aroused, feel moisture on their thighs, or dripping down their legs… I understand getting wet, but these books make it sound like it’s spilling out of them. Is that just fictional exaggeration, or does it actually happen? Thanks!
A: What an appropriate question to follow last week’s post on squirting!
General day-to-day wetness varies from person to person, as does the lubrication that’s produced when you’re aroused. Lots of different factors can influence how wet you are in either context – estrogen level (which can be affected by factors like your age and whether you’re on any hormonal birth control), where you are in your menstrual cycle, medications you may be taking, and so on.
As with many other sex- and body-related things, it’s a continuum – there are women who produce very little lubrication and women who are naturally very wet and get wetter quite easily. There’s data about how much menstrual fluid women produce, but we haven’t been able to find any similar information about wetness. (Not that formal studies are necessarily the best way to understand people’s sexual reactions, but we thought it might be interesting.) Our guess would be that most women are somewhere towards the middle of that continuum but that some fall closer to the “really juicy” end. (I can think of a few different advice columns I’ve read in which women have written in because they feel like they get too wet and it’s interfering with the pleasurable friction that penetrative sex can provide.)
Personally, I’ve always gotten wet very easily, and I have experienced that feeling of moisture at the tops of my thighs that you mentioned when I’m in one of those “so turned on I can’t stand it” situations. As far as being so aroused there was, like, a small waterfall in my pants, I have not experienced that and I’m inclined to say that you’re probably right in thinking that it’s one of those exaggerated descriptions that sometimes appear in erotica or romance novels. But I also tend to think that for almost any sexual interest or experience you can think of, somebody out there has done it or likes it or experiences it, so I don’t want to say that the dripping you described never happens to anyone ever. And considering last week’s post about how squirting can happen independent of an orgasm (and that it can sometimes be more of a little trickle as opposed to an all-out squirt), I also wonder if that sudden burst of wetness could be explained in that way.
What about you, Persephoneers? Have you or a partner ever experienced what our question-asker is describing?
Keep the great questions coming! (Hee.) Got a question to ask, subject you’d like us to discuss, or myth you’d like us to bust? You can e-mail us at FriskyFeminist@persephonemagazine.com or send us an anonymous message via the spiffy new Ask Us! feature here.