Open Thread

This Open Thread Will Rock Your Body

I’m not a person who typically works out or enjoys working out or talks about her time at the gym, but y’all, I just discovered rowing machines and they are made of awesome. But you know what’s better than working out at the gym on a rowing machine?

Having the gym blast the video below while you’re doing it.


Whoa! Unexpected ’90s nostalgic bliss on the rowing machine! The Backstreet Boys were terrible, but they were our terrible, weren’t they?

Tell us all about what’s going on with your life in the comments. We’re totes the clean-cut cute boy of the ladyblogs.


By Michelle Miller

Michelle Miller is a twenty-something blogger, cook, freelance writer and editor living in Seattle, Washington. She’s a feminist trying ever-so-hard to embrace her spaces, conventional or not. She looks forward to numerous bad hair days, burnt cremes, a soapbox or two, and maybe (just maybe) a yellow polka-dot bikini in the years ahead.

60 replies on “This Open Thread Will Rock Your Body”

If you’re a Parks & Rec fan, you might have heard that it was cancelled. Now, I’ve never watched the show, but a lot of feminist women I deeply respect adore it. I figure, if they love it that much, it is absolutely worth trying to save.

So, there’s a petition on about it. I went ahead and signed it, and here’s the link in case it’s something you’d like to join in:

I’m down in the dumps tonight. I have a lil-none-so-important feminist blog…and even being extremely unimportant, I’m trolled just for having feminist thoughts. Like 30% of my overall comments are calling me a bitch, whiner, overly sensitive, illogical, harpy, zealot, emotional, etc. etc. etc. Early on I learned I had to go to moderation. Every time I get a comment in my queue my stomach drops because I’m worried about what abuse I’ll have to wade through in order to approve the neutral/positive comments.

I’m TRYING so hard to grow a thick skin. I really am. I’m getting good at rolling my eyes and the typical, inane bullshit which references me making a sandwich or calls me a name. But today I got a long, ranting comment that just cut deep.

Why should this stuff bother me? I don’t know this person from anyone…I mean, really I should be able to brush this off. I should take satisfaction in the fact that I so enrage misogynists that they can’t control the impulse to berate me. And yet still…the occasional comment just gets me.

/internet hugs

I’m sorry people suck so much. I think you’re awesome, and they just don’t have enough self respect to leave well meaning people like yourself alone in order to deal with their own issues. I hope they leave you alone soon.

I had a similar conversation with someone a few months ago, about how I was dreading going in to delete a list of crap comments, and the person I was talking to said “I love doing that! Every time I press the button, I get to say ‘Haha, I’m deleting you!'” It helped me a lot. I would also suggest that you don’t have to read the whole comment. It’s OK to hit delete as soon as you realize that it is trash.

My other blog is just now starting to get backlash, and it’s actually kind of fun! Because it’s my space, and I can make people go away if I want to. They can have their opinions, but I don’t have to provide the space for them to do so.

Plus, if they’re insulting you, then A) they’re reading, and B) you made them mad enough to comment. Those are victories.

Can you set up word filters? Where certain keywords automagically send the comment to comment purgatory? If you’re on WordPress, I can totally show you how to do that. You can also use IP addresses to look for repeat offenders and do a blanket ban.

We’re really lucky here, we don’t get asshole commenters, but I have a good plan ready just in case we do. I’d be more than happy to help you figure out a way to cut down on the jerks.

I’m on Blogger, so not as sophisticated. I’m not entirely sure what words I would fitler too because all the ones used against me could also have legit application. I need to look into IP options. I feel like Blogger is really limited.

I echo the thanks about your plan for here–I love what a safe space this is :)


I contend that you do not, in fact, need to get thicker skin.  Things should affect us.  Things should bug us.  If you are bothered by something someone says, does that not mean that you have solidified what you believe?  The fact that someone else is showing their ignorance by insulting you is upsetting and it should be.  I think (please note my use of the word think) people who say that they don’t care what other people think or say are deluded or are they’re lying.

As a person who is oft described as overly-sensitive, I have decided to wear that label as a badge of honor.    Because I’m sensitive, I write my congressmen* when they are being dicks, I volunteer to help change things that make me feel icky or upset, I tell people why their words or actions make me cry.  My sensitivity is my best quality.  My guess is that your sensitivity would at least be in your top five best qualities too.

*I’d love to use Congresspeople, but I live in Idaho, so .  . .

You know, I think you’re absolutely right. I’m not sure that I will ever stop caring about this stuff. If I did, it would probably be a sad day where I just gave up on caring in general. I guess what I really want is for me to not take the stuff personally. I can’t see me ever brushing off what they say totally, but it’d be nice if that panic of feeling bullied could wear off. Thanks!

If it helps, you are most definitely not alone. Most of all female bloggers who are open about being female go through this sort of thing…even if what they’re saying is totally uncontroversial. Let alone if you’re talking about feminism. It’s not always talked about, because a lot of times there’s a need to keep quiet about it to appear strong, to “not let the trolls win.” But it is absolutely one of the forces that try to silence female bloggers.

I tried to find some of the more recent articles I read about female bloggers sharing this. I can’t find them right now, but I did find this Guardian article talking about it: (Note: TW for misogyny, rape threats, abusive behaviors)

…. maybe ….

There may be three or four shows that I have never finished, since I was trying to savor the last few episodes while waiting for a new season, and I just never went back. At this point, though, I would have to watch the whole season, and sometimes, show, over again just to know where I was.

Thank you! I feel much better knowing I’m not alone. Sometimes I feel like I could just jump right back into a show and other times I think I should go find some recaps to catch myself back up. For some reason I can only rewatch tv shows if I’m watching it with someone. First time I can watch by myself but the second time? That’s for sharing!

I re-watch parts of season 7, mostly beautiful Spike moments.  I really love Spike, and I still like him in seasons 6 and 7, so I watch for him.  But yeah, I just can’t get that into it, and tend to cherrypick episodes.  Other seasons I re-watch in their entirety.

Trigun is one of my favorite animes. When they brought the manga translations over I was on it like flies on shit. Except I have never read the last two volumes. Cause then it would be over. I also put off reading the volume where I knew one of my favorite characters was going to die for a really long time.

I wasn’t too fond of Trigun myself but I have this problem with anime series too a lot. I’m about halfway through probably three series. I’m enjoying them but I just… stop. Sometimes I’ll pick them up again and finish them but most likely not. Strangely even though I didn’t enjoy Trigun I made myself watch all the episodes even though I didn’t really care for it. Everyone had pushed it so hard I couldn’t NOT watch it all. I wanted to like it.

The manga is a lot better than the anime (different plot is different), and I’ve found that the anime doesn’t hold up as well after re-watching some of it. I was 14 when I first saw it and I think it has the rosy mist of nostalgia for me.

Yes! I did that with season 4 of Mad Men. I powered through the first three seasons in an embarrassingly short amount of time but it took me so long to finish season 4 that I had no idea what was going on by the time I got to the last episode.

I keep getting in to huge arguments with my father about birth control and church rights on the matter, which while enlightening is causing a huge rift in our relationship because we both take it super seriously and while technically on the same side of the issue, I’m not nearly as conservative about it at he is. He tends to live in a stark black and white world, where as I live in all sorts of shades of grey. I just wish we could avoid the topic and the fight, but it just keeps coming up in conversation. It’s like we’re circling it. And that leads to an even bigger fight about rape victims and abortion and then he always ends the conversation angry and yelling that he’ll pray for my soul because I obviously need it. And yes my father has always been a religious zealot, but he used to be tolerant and loving. He is the person who taught me to love everyone because there are many ways to the top of the mountain and not to judge people who are taking a different route than I am. So I just can’t figure how to reconcile the two images of my father: the one who raised me versus the one who thinks I’m abandoning my faith and my people. Blegh.

I’m so right there with you. The issue of birth control is off the table when I visit my family because we can’t agree. I’m not even talking about the abortion issue; it’s just the pill that gets everyone so enraged.

It’s so easy for people to make it a “you’re losing your faith because you don’t see things my way” argument. The first tip-off is that they are angry when they say that, which means they probably don’t REALLY believe it; they just want to scare YOU into believing it.


I feel your pain. :-/

My parents are relatively enlightened on the BC issue, but my dad threw my mom and I both for a loop here recently regarding rape culture and certain jackass from Pittsburgh. Dad got on my case for referring to the him as “Rapelisbuger,” since “he hasn’t been convicted – and aren’t you the one always championing the rights of defendants?” Yes, dad – especially in a justice system where there’s very little actual justice. Especially if you’re poor, black, etc. Or, you know, unable to access resources for your own protection/vindication of rights. The police fuck-up in that case?  To the benefit of someone immensely privileged?

Court of law and court of public opinion are not the same thing. I got zero problem calling someone like this what they are, especially when it’s part and parcel of a deeply fucked up system. My dad not getting that was on hell of an ugly shock.

I turned in my last project of the semester today, and I’m free for a whole MONTH before summer classes started.  I had a beer, translated some Latin, read, and am now watching Singin’ in the Rain to celebrate.  Tomorrow, the celebratory drinking begins!

It’s a good day.

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