There are too many things to be ragey about right now. I need to shower myself and our lovely readers with some joy.
We have horrible rape apologists, more brutal rapes in India, abortion and contraceptive rights are still being attacked regularly, the House passed the Ryan budget and is starting the same old debt ceiling nonsense, and worst of all, some yahoos are trying to contain Jon Hamm’s penis. What the fuck, world? Why are you doing this to us? With all the other shit you throw, you could at least leave us the Hamm’s junk to marvel at. Sheesh.
On the home front, I just found out that due to the foreclosure on our house, I am facing some unanticipated–though, unfortunately, totally legitimate– tax issues to the tune of around $8k. Awesome. We also found out we have termites and need to tent Nana’s house, which isn’t at all stupid or inconvenient. My truck is 13 years old, and while she’s the best little truck in the whole wide world, she isn’t going to live forever. She has more than 250,000 miles on her, so I really can’t ask a whole lot more from the little lady. Long story short, things are starting to pile up. The money I was able to save is dwindling much too quickly. And yet, I have so many things to be thankful and grateful for.
It is hard to stay positive in the face of adversity. Those who smile and claim “everything is fine!” when they are dealt super stressful situations are often one small mishap away from full on breakdown. I don’t fault anyone their right to be mad, sad, pissed, or overwhelmed when life gets to be too much. Those emotions can often spur us on or can give us the strength to keep going, keep fighting. For me, though, I need to remind myself regularly of how much worse off I could be. I have to force myself to keep some perspective. I don’t intend to minimize the suffering or hardships of others; this is merely what I have to do for myself.
For example, I could be going through crappy stuff without a supportive and loving family. I could have a strained relationship with my husband; instead, I am married to one of my best friends. I could have these tax issues and also be paying the outrageous California rental prices; instead, I pay Nana very reasonable rent and cover utilities. For me, it could be worse. Much worse. So I look around, find things that make me smile, and realize there are so many things that make life just a little bit better because they exist.
For example, one of my most awesome artist friends, Jessica Starkey, who is also a professor at UNLV, just got written up in the student paper and will be having a show of her work this summer. In case you all were ever wondering what I would look like in a stovepipe hat and an Abraham Lincoln beard, here you go.
These photos were shot on the beach in San Francisco and it was freaking freezing, as you can tell from my nipples. While I never had any desire to be a bikini model, throw in a beard and giant hat and I change my tune. I can’t help but smile when I see these.
Miley Cyrus made a ridiculous music video, and she is wearing a unicorn onesie. This is something that exists. Why do I not have one in my closet already? Also, at about 38 seconds into that video, Miley does an amazing booty pop. I have tried for years to get my body to do that, and it just won’t. I’m not saying I have moves like Beyonce or anything, but I can shake my groove thang pretty decently. Why, oh why, can I not do a booty pop? It is one of my life goals. Anybody have any tips? Also, searching “booty pop” on YouTube yields some fascinating results.
And then there are animals. Few things make me happier than animals. It is hard to be mad at the world when a dog is trying desperately to lick your nose.
This is her hipster, downtown, I-don’t-give-a-fuck look
This is her uptown, I-don’t-like-a-smelly-mutt look. Photo by Rachael Harms Photography. Check out more of her beautiful work here. Seriously, I marvel at how that is the same dog. But goodness, she is so cute either way.
Or when you dress your cat up in an Elvis costume.
Or when you put creepy glasses on the dog.
Or when kittens are so sleepy they just need to nap, no matter where they are.
Or when you realize how happy your old foster kittens are in their new home.
One last thing that cheers me up when I am feeling blue is this last photo. I like to imagine the meeting that took place in which the people in attendance decided this was the route they wanted to take. I like to wonder if most of them were thinking “chicken” while one sneaky, immature, and totally awesome employee sat in the corner hiding their giggles behind their hand. Because seriously, Panda Express?
That panda hearts cock.
What makes you all smile when you are close to going into a rage blackout? And, as always, adorable animal pics are welcome in the comments! Or anything smile inducing.