Let’s just go ahead and agree: Our culture is sneakily patriarchal. Some of the things we say and do (and that others say and do) are such a part of our every day life, that we look back afterwards and go, “Huh. So that was some subtext.” Other types we just want to yell, “Shut up. Shut up. Shut up.” Here are some of those times.
And so, for your enjoyment, a series of vignettes of true conversations that I have had with real human beings in the last year.
With a random person at the park:
“Are you married?”
“No.”
“God has made the perfect man for a nice girl like you. Just keep praying, He’ll show you. You’ll be married in no time.”
With a coworker:
“You’re young! You have plenty of time to have kids! What are you, 22?”
“I’m 27.”
“Oh. You should probably get on that then.”
With the dentist’s office:
“Your name?”
“Amandamarieg.”
“The name of the insured?”
“Amandamarieg.”
“No, your spouse’s name so that I can look it up through MetLife.”
“I am the insured. I am the employee. It’s my insurance.”
With a vendor:
“Are you even old enough to work here?” [Say it with a leer!]
“Yes.” [I am only 6 months younger than the men around me at this time.]
With a realtor:
“What do you think about this one?”
“I am buying the house, not him. It will be in my name, like we discussed on the phone. Please look at me.”
With another coworker:
“Take them to that girl.”
“Who?”
“You know, that girl that handles this stuff.”
“She is a grandmother. Twice over.”
“Yeah. That girl.”
In the hallway:
“Smile!”
“I’m at work.”
