New Show Recap: Parenthood 5×22, “The Pontiac”

After a season full of surprises and heartbreak, Parenthood ends season five with the same theme. Haddie comes home from college with great hair and a girlfriend, Anna Beth Gish makes an appearance as Ryan’s domineering mother, and Joel and Julia hold hands. Oh Parenthood. I don’t even know where to start.

Let’s start with Drew, who is finishing up his freshman year at Berkeley. As Natalie gets on the bus to Portland, she yells to him, “I love you!” and he looks at her like a deer in headlights. Drew, you don’t actually love her, but whatever. As he and the other Braverman men help Zeek to move (Zeek! They are called movers! They are worth the money!), he laments his no money more problems situation. Zeek surprised Drew with a reward for the best mover- the keys to his lovingly restored Pontiac. What? Drew drives off to Portland.

Haddie is also home from Cornell, and she arrives in a cab with her ‘super special best friend.’ First point- seriously, Adam would drive to the airport. Second point- what college student has the money for a hairstyle like that? Anyway. Haddie has a girlfriend and she’s nervous about telling her parents, but after Max walks in on her and Lauren smooching, she has to. Kristina reassures her that she loves her no matter what, and that’s the end of that. See you at the end of next season, Haddie.

Victor wins an essay contest at school, which ends up giving Julia and Joel a reason to see each other. Victor does an outstanding job reading his essay in front of his family and the whole school. It’s a sweet look as his relationship with Zeek and the role restoring the car had in their relationship. It gave all the Braverman’s warm fuzzies. After fro-yo and an evening together, Sydney begs Joel to stay through bedtime. He does, and as he and Julia put Syd to bed, they wander through memories together. As Sydney falls asleep, they end up holding hands. But that’s it. No conversation, no hook up, no further scenes together. Ugh.

Amber, Hank and Sarah are still standing vigil at Ryan’s bedside. Sarah is surprised but happy Hank is sticking around. Amber is surprised when Ryan’s mom, Melody, pops in and announces that he’s been discharged from the Army AND that he’s going home to Wyoming with her. Melody steamrolls Amber and Amber comes to realize that Ryan hasn’t said a word about her to his mom. When they’re alone, Ryan tells her about his accident, and that he does, in fact, need to go with his mom. Somehow, we are to believe that they make love in the hospital bed. I’m not exactly sure how, but whatever. We later see Amber buying a pregnancy test, which is weird and too soon, but you know, plot movement.

Sarah ends up committing to Hank after a frank talk about his Asperger-like behaviors (I don’t think there’s been a definitive diagnosis, but all roads lead there). She stops by his studio and kisses him, and there you go. It looks like we’ll be seeing Hank again next season.

The show ends with the first Braverman family dinner (is Amber drinking soda not wine?) at Camille and Zeek’s new place. I can only assume that it was catered/carry out, because who can throw a dinner party for twenty some odd people the same weekend they move into their new home?