Friday News Bites: Scalia Replacement Significance, Shkreli Karma + More

Happy Friday, Unicorns! Time once again to catch up on some of the news stories catching my eye this week.

Supreme Court Justice Antonin Scalia died this week, age 79. He was a conservative member of the court, and said a lot of horrible things over his career, but I guess it sucks for his family and friends. There. That’s the amount of sympathy I can drum up.

Those Constitution-loving Republicans took time away from their jeopardizing-the-health-and-safety-of-others schedule to immediately say they would reject whoever President Obama nominates in his place. Or that he should not nominate anyone at all, never mind that pesky Constitution, and leave it to whoever wins the next Presidential election.

Never mind that Republicans voted in Justice Anthony Kennedy no problem when Reagan was in his last year in office. And past Senate Majority Leader Mitch McConnell has something to say too:

More Politics

Marco Rubio aired a “Morning in America” campaign ad. One problem: The skyline shown is that of Vancouver, British Columbia. You know, Canada.

Gotta read the tags on that stock footage you’re buying, media intern.

Speaking of Canada and horrible election outcomes: Cape Breton Island in rural Nova Scotia is offering refuge to Americans in the event of a Trump victory. Commune anyone?

(No, just get out there and vote, so we don’t have to consider it!!)

A bill banning transgender students in public schools from using restrooms and locker rooms that match their gender identity passed South Dakota’s state legislature and now heads for the governor’s desk.

It is, of course, discriminatory bullshit, and if you want you can sign a petition stating your thoughts on the matter here.

On a related note: Some asshole tried to say that he should be allowed in the women’s locker room at a Seattle pool. That’s not how gender identity works, dude, and you’re not helpful.

In Other News:

Professional Waste of Space Martin Shkreli allegedly tried to buy the new Kanye album for himself and himself alone, and he was instead catfished out of $15 mil. LOLOLOL forever.

Speaking of Kanye: The album was briefly available for download via Tidal, but then Kanye un-released it, and it will be out for real… soon.  Okay.

The FBI wants Apple to unlock the San Bernardino shooter’s phone, and Apple said no:

In the wrong hands, this software — which does not exist today — would have the potential to unlock any iPhone in someone’s physical possession. The FBI may use different words to describe this tool, but make no mistake: Building a version of iOS that bypasses security in this way would undeniably create a backdoor. And while the government may argue that its use would be limited to this case, there is no way to guarantee such control…

However, Apple has done similar unlocking measures 70 times before.

GlaxoSmithKline have recalled their Ventolin HFA (albuterol sulfate) inhalers. Click through to see if your inhaler is among those recalled. (This is a post from Dec. 2015, but we’re not that far away from that, so I figured I’d better mention it.)

Pope Francis has somewhat relaxed his stance on contraception in the face of the spreading Zika virus.

So… some of that Parmesan cheese you’re buying isn’t so much cheese but wood pulp instead.

The entirety of indie band Viola Beach died in a car crash in Sweden last Saturday. How awful.

In Entertainment:

Glenda Jackson, actor-turned-politician, is returning to the stage as the lead in King Lear. That’s awesome.

Kendrick Lamar’s performance at the Grammys made everyone pay attention to the Grammys again.

Ever wonder what word was “born” the year you were born? Wonder no more. (Mine is “air guitar,” by the way.)

And finally, the 2016 Best in Show at the Westminster Kennel Club Dog Show was a German shorthaired pointer named CJ.

CJ the German shorthaired pointer - Westminster Kennel Club

Until next time, friends.

By Sara Habein

Sara Habein is the author of Infinite Disposable, a collection of microfiction, and her work has appeared on The Rumpus, Pajiba and Word Riot, among others. Her book reviews and other commentary appear at Glorified Love Letters, and she is the co-manager of Electric City Creative.

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