Deus ex MacIntosh: Sassing Up The Entryway

Deus ex MacIntosh used to be a tongue-in-cheek advice column that didn’t work out. Now, it’s something completely different.

Deus ex MacIntosh: What Should I Be When I Grow Up?

Dear Selena, I’m a lady on the verge of adulthood, and I have no idea what I want to do with my life. Can you and TV help me decide? Sincerely, Confused

Deus ex MacIntosh: Our Daughters, Ourselves

Dear Selena: My wonderful, amazing. beautiful teenager told me the other day that she thinks she’s “not pretty.” This is objectively untrue, but like most teenagers, she can’t see through her own insecurities. What, Oh TV Guru, would the great sitcoms of the past do to help a teenager improve their self image? Signed, Frustrated […]

Deus ex MacIntosh: Now We’re Cooking with Gas

“Dear Selena, I have invited my boyfriend’s parents over for Christmas dinner, but I’ve never really prepared a big fancy dinner before. Can television help me show them a night they’ll never forget? Signed, Culinary Neophyte”

Deus ex MacIntosh: Meh, Strippers.

I caught my husband frequenting an online stripper website. I’m not as upset about this as society tells me I should be, so I feel like I should be more upset. What should I do, Deus ex MacIntosh?

Deus ex MacIntosh: It Could Be Worse

Dear Deus ex MacIntosh, What the fuck is up with mother-in-laws and why can’t they ever shut the hell up about my radish flowers and other inane minutae? Signed, Defeated Daughter-in-Law

Deus ex MacIntosh: It’s Just A Little Crush

We’re back for another round of Deus ex MacIntosh, where I solve your problems with the help of TV.  Like always, this column is for yuks, not for helping anyone make serious decisions. 

Deus ex MacIntosh: Winning an Internet Argument

Dear Selena, How can TV help me win an Internet argument? Signed, Loaded for Bear, Needs Outlet

Deus ex MacIntosh: Cats vs. Dogs

We’re back for another session of Deus ex MacIntosh, where we find all life’s answers in TV. Or at least have fun looking at old clips. As always, my advice is for entertainment purposes only. If you follow any of my advice it is at your own risk, and may require photographic evidence.

Deus ex MacIntosh: My Mom Hates My Fiance

Welcome back to Deus ex MacIntosh, where I help you solve your pressing life issues with the help of my encyclopedic knowledge of television.  Remember: this column is purely for entertainment purposes, and I’m not responsible if you decide to follow any of my terrible advice.  

Deus ex MacIntosh: Unrequited

Welcome back to Deus ex MacIntosh, where I put hours of wasting my time in front of the television to good use – by solving your problems. As always, this column is for entertainment purposes only, actually following any of my advice is a terrible idea.  To the letter! 

Deus ex MacIntosh: My Friends are Jerks

Welcome to our newest feature on Persephone Magazine, Deus ex MacIntosh, where I use TV to solve your problems.  Today’s question was culled from an email conversation among the editors. Please note, take the following advice with both a grain of salt and with your tongue in your cheek. I’m typically funnier than I am […]