Categories
Perspectives

The Friend Breakup: What it Is, How to Recognize it, How to Handle It

“I’ve been friends with her for 10 years. I just saw on Facebook that she’s been in town hanging out with our other friends, but not with me. When I ask her if she’s mad at me, she dismisses me, but then I don’t hear from her for months.” “She still wants to hang out […]

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Perspectives

Fitting In With The Cool Crowd

The first time I was asked to hang out with the most popular girl in our sixth grade class, I remember feeling a sense of rush and excitement. A short brown girl with thick hair hovering above my shoulders, breasts that developed too quickly for an 11-year-old, shadows of acne spread across my cheeks and […]

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Perspectives

Distance Friendships — Sometimes, Add Effort?

Ever since my father put me to the Internet, I have been figuring out how to make, and maintain, long-distance friendships. I can tell you now that the first distance friendship I had some semblance of control over started in third grade. I can also tell you that in ten years, I still am no […]

Categories
Life

The Psychology of Letting Go

TW: death, suicide Last July, my friend J was found in a park, dead by his own hand. And I lost it. I’m still not completely sure why: though he’d been a huge influence on me, he’d also been out of my life for several years. 

Categories
Food

On Food and Bonding

As a person who sometimes suffers from severe social anxiety, I often have a hard time finding common ground with people. I’m the awkward person off in the corner, biting the inside of my mouth and trying to find an in into the conversation.

Categories
Movies

Movie Review: One Day

The past few weeks have been an endurance marathon of perseverance on many fronts. The news has often strained my ability to retain my belief in the inherent good in man and not give in the abject despair that greets you at every turn when you look at the headlines. So, to escape reality for […]

Categories
Mental Illness

Caregiving: Friendships

So. This week has decided not to behave itself and I didn’t realise quite how time was getting on. But I’m here now, with a cup of tea (green tea and cranberry, as it happens), suitably yummy things within reach and Laurena Segura playing in the background.

Categories
Life

Canceling Your Membership to the “Drama Club”

I just celebrated a birthday last week, and one of my resolutions to my newly 30-something self was that I was going to take any means necessary to end the drama in my life. As a person with high levels of anxiety, high blood pressure and occasional black moods, I felt it would be beneficial […]

Categories
Life

Sssshhhh!!! Can You Keep a Secret?

In Hey, That’s MY Business! Information Control I talked about the ways people try to control others by attempting to dictate what they can and can’t talk about.  Some people, I argued,  like to label topics as “their business,” which is to put it plainly, a lie. 

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Perspectives

Musings of a Reformed Judgy McJudgerson

My favorite book, The Great Gatsby, begins like this: “Whenever you feel like criticizing anyone,” he told me, “just remember not everyone has had the same advantages you’ve had.”

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Lunchtime Poll

Lunchtime Poll 1/18

I expect today’s poll to be controversial and fraught with indecision for our dear readers. This highly-charged debate has been raging for years and has been known to break up friendships and marriages alike. I ask you: what…is your favorite cereal?

Categories
Generation XX

Girl Haters, I Am On To You

If you are a woman, and you have no female friends, it is not logical to assume that the reason for this is that there is something wrong with every other woman on the planet. Most women are able to maintain friendships with other women, so it may just be eminently more likely that, if […]