Categories
Books

Book Review: The Middle of Somewhere, by Sonja Yoerg

In Sonja Yoerg’s novel The Middle of Somewhere, Liz Kroft is about to turn thirty, but for someone so young, she has a lot of emotional baggage she needs to work through. The opportunity presents itself when she decides to take a solitary hike on the John Muir Trail in the Yosemite Valley. When her boyfriend Dante […]

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Pets

“It’s Me Or the Dog”

If you’re reading this, perhaps you are in this situation. Your significant other wants to move on to the next phase in your relationship, but before that happens, your dog or cat needs to go. You’ve been presented with an ultimatum: you can have love or you can keep your dog, and you don’t know […]

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Music

A Playlist of Relationships and Breakups

While creating an Ultimate ’90s Playlist, I got to thinking about my past crushes and relationships. Probably because of the influence of TV and movies, I tend to associate specific songs with each person. Like how on Friends, “With or Without You” was used for Ross and Rachel. My playlist is roughly in chronological order. Roughly. […]

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Perspectives

Domestic Violence, Facilitated Dialogues, and Finding Inner Peace

On Monday and Tuesday of this week, I attended a training for the Domestic Violence Safe Dialogue program here in Oregon. The program takes on a restorative justice model, by creating a space where surrogate victims and offenders of domestic violence can speak to each other about their experiences. The facilitated dialogue allows for victims […]

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Perspectives

Chasing Autonomy

To begin, I am the girl who always has a boyfriend. I know you’re making assumptions right now and I’m here to tell you that yes, they are all true. I am needy, possessive, selfish, and in constant need of my significant other’s attention. I am your textbook case study of a girl who always […]

Categories
Sex

Wanting A Billion Bones

Q. This year marked the first serious relationship of my life. Despite this, he never loved me; I loved him, but it was the kind of love where you’re like, it would be fun to love someone today, oh look, how about him.

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Perspectives

What Maya Taught Me

Words are not enough to express the sense of loss I felt after hearing of Dr. Maya Angelou’s death yesterday morning.

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Perspectives

My Vulgar Peculiarities: How I Came to Love My Vibrator

The first time I saw Madonna’s “Justify My Love” music video, I was only about 6 or 7 years old. It was playing on a late night music video show on MTV, and because I always had minimal supervision, I saw the whole music video without interruption, or fear of my parents finding out. I […]

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Sex

Interview With Sara Eckel, Author of It’s Not You: 27 (Wrong) Reasons You’re Single

Give me a single woman over the age of 27, and I will show you a culture that is all too happy to pick away at what’s wrong with her.

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Perspectives

5 Pinball Machines Your Wife Will Play When She Leaves You to Become a Lesbian

So, bad news first: my existential expose of an expedition to the cooing Canadian winter to find myself through threesomes that thrill and the tender, forgiving touch of a woman’s love has been delayed because I am not well, at all, and I’d feel disingenuous talking about how I “found myself abroad” while I’m shopping […]

Categories
Sex

Stay or Go: The Weight of the Flawed

Q. My boyfriend confronted me last night and told me that he felt I wasn’t being supportive of him enough (we go to grad school together, and we’re taking one class together; I gave him a B+ on his presentation). I tried to apologize and told him that I wasn’t aware it meant a lot […]

Categories
Perspectives

On The Love And Life We Think We Deserve

A dear colleague-turned-friend of mine is planning to head to the jewelry store this weekend to pick out her engagement ring. She already has the wedding dress, potentially the new home and the rest of her future planned out. She was just waiting for the right guy to turn up.

Categories
Sex

Look At All These Tangled Thorns: Guilt, Empathy, And Not Proving A Point

Q. I don’t really know how to ask this because it seems a little muddled in my head, and when I try to simplify it, it just doesn’t seem important, but it’s something that I can’t really gain control of. I can’t seem to sustain a relationship past the first week.

Categories
Life

The VERY Commitment: Or, If You Wanna Fly…

Q. I have been in a relationship with a man for almost four years. We have a one-year-old son. (We operate as if we are married. Marriage is not a factor. We are VERY committed, joint accounts and wills, etc.) I am a perfectionist. I know this is not a positive quality but I have […]

Categories
Sex

Lover Of Unreason: On Convincing, Or Really, Not At All

Q. I’m in a monogamous, heterosexual relationship, and I don’t always (or often) orgasm from intercourse. It really seems to bother my partner. I don’t fake it, because that seems pointless, and he always gets me off before we get to the “main act,” but I can tell he thinks he’s failing somehow. How do […]