My mama, when she thought something was too good to be true, she’d say, “˜Satan in a Sunday hat.’ That’s exactly what this is.
I’m so happy and proud to shake the hand of someone with your values. Too often we’re governed by criminals and hypocrites. Don’t you agree? But I can tell you’re a man of virtues, and I applaud the effort you’re making against the poor and disenfranchised, especially the vampires and the gays.
I’m an organic vegan and my carbon footprint is miniscule.
I mentioned once before that I’m writing these True Blood recaps with the gracious assistance of my local public library, which was nice enough to buy all three seasons of the show so us broke people don’t have to. Unfortunately, with only two episodes left in the first season, I had to turn the DVDs […]
Everyone has to eat, right? We’re all links on the universal food chain. See, squirrel eats nuts, snake eats the squirrel, gator eats the snake. And we can eat pretty much anything we want. It’s the circle of life.
What I do on my own time is no concern of yours or any of y’all’s. Yes! I had sex with Bill, and since every one of y’all’s too chicken to ask, it was great! I enjoyed every second of it. And if you don’t like that, you can just fire me!
There’s a woman lyin’ dead downstairs. She wouldn’t be there if it weren’t for you. Anything happens to Sookie, I promise… I’ll be sharpening a stake with your name on it.
“If you’re gonna accuse me of lying, be a man and say it out loud, for Pete’s sake. Either way, I’m gonna hear you whether you look me in the eye or not. Let’s face it, there’s not a whole lotta ideas in there. Like mice in a cage.”
Um, I read. You’re not the first vain-ass, body-conscious ex-jock to overdo the V and wind up with an acute case of priapism!
You think that it’s not magic that keeps you alive? Just ’cause you understand the mechanics of how something works, doesn’t make it any less of a miracle “¦ which is just another word for magic. We’re all kept alive by magic, Sookie. My magic’s just a little different from yours, that’s all.
“Bill, you were just licking blood out of my head. I don’t think it gets much more personal than that.” We pick up right where last week’s episode ended, with Sookie getting thrashed by the Rattrays. It’s a brutal scene ““ I couldn’t use any stills from it because the images were so gory.